What's so funny about green building? Email me and let me know, or comment below. Here's my latest contribution to the genre of green building jokes:

A LEED-certified building walks into a bar around closing time. It orders a drink, throws it back, and leaves. The next night, it comes in again, asks the bartender for a shot, throws it back, and leaves. It does this every night for the next year, without fail. On the 365th night, after the building has had its shot, the bartender is surprised to see it sidle up to the bar's piano instead of leaving. The building grabs a microphone and warbles Sinatra's "My Way." Before the bartender can interrupt, the building starts immediately into a shaky rendition of "Oh What a Beautiful Mornin'" from "Oklahoma!" Again, before the bartender can interrupt, the building continues right on, belting out Abba's "Dancing Queen." After the third song the bartender is finally able to get the building's attention. "What's going on?" he says. "All you've done for the last year is come in here and quietly have a drink just like any other average person after a day of work. Now all of a sudden you think you're the entertainment." "What's the problem?" the building replies. "All I've been hearing since I was designed is 'It looks good so far, but wait till we see its actual performance numbers after a year of occupancy.' Well, here they are."

Image: The Schmitt Music Mural in Minneapolis, MN.